Alana Estelle

In The Turnout by, Megan Abbott, the Durant sisters, Dara and Marie, run their mother’s ballet school with the assistance of Dara’s husband Charlie. An “accident” occurs at the studio, which opens the door for Derek, a contractor, to puncture Dara, Marie and Charlie’s insular life. Thus, tension builds up between the sisters and Derek, events spiral out of control, and all right before the school’s annual Nutcracker performance. 

There is only so much I can say about the plot, as this is classified as a thriller and even small details will spoil major plot points. So, I’ll focus on themes that interested me while being spoiler-free. 

I mentioned this in my halfway review of this book and I think it needs to be reiterated - This. Book. Is. Weird! And you know what, I’m here for it! The Turnout is grimy, claustrophobic, animalic, intense, carnal, and ripe with sexual tension (the innuendos are limitless…), which is not something that typically comes to mind when one thinks of ballet. When people think of ballet, they think of long, lean, graceful dancers who seem to float effortlessly in their intricate tutus and satin shoes. Abbott did this on purpose because many non-dancers don’t understand how difficult ballet really is. 

Side bar: True story, a guy came up to me in the gym recently after my ballet class and asked if ballet improves flexibility. (My guy… yes.) I then went on to tell him that ballet is the most difficult thing I’ve physically done with and to my body. Lifting weights in the gym with my physical therapist a few years ago while I was recovering from a knee injury, was easier than what my instructor sometimes asks us to do. The look of incredulity was apparent on his face. I told him if he wants to push himself physically, take ballet. (He  took a flyer and is contemplating signing up for the beginner’s class…). Also, I’m still waiting for the toenail on my left big toe to fall off. It’s just taking it’s sweet time...

In The Turnout, Abbott creates a world of dualities - Innocence vs. Carnality; youth vs. adulthood; femininity vs. masculinity; pain vs. pleasure; beauty vs. ugliness and so on. 

“To her, all dancers’ feet were beautiful, beautiful not in spite of but because of their hardness, their contortions, their battle against nature, against the body itself. ‘What could be more beautiful,’ she used to say, ‘than a will like that?’” 

From the first page of this book, I was on the look out to see why Abbott titled this book The Turnout. Turnout is crucial in ballet - it refers to how flexible a dancer is at the hips; the goal is to have the thigh get as parallel as possible from that joint that connects it to the hip. This helps produce those long, graceful lines and extensions that ballet dancers are known for. “Turnout” is mentioned several times throughout the novel. Dancers seek to achieve a perfect turnout, and when  it is achieved, it’s admired and considered a milestone. Abbott is using turnout here as a sexual metaphor, as the turnout requires an opening up from the hips. There is pre-turnout (virginal) and post-turnout (a right-of-passage). 

“… or the first time they achieved turnout, rotating their legs from their hip sockets, bodies pushed to contortion. Pushed so far, the feel ecstatic. Her first time, Dara felt split open, laid bare.”

(Disclaimer: please don’t force your turnout. There are even professional dancers who don’t have a perfect turnout because some of it is based on each individual’s anatomy. You can really injure yourself and mess up your hips.)

Using turnout as a sexual metaphor falls right in line with why Abbott selected The Nutcrack to run in the background of this book. The Nutcracker is often the gateway into ballet for many people - dancers and non-dancers alike. It symbolizes innocence, as the main character Clara ventures into a fantastical world with the Nutcracker Prince. All of this also ties in with Derek…

“She becomes fixated with her little Nutcracker. So fixated she sneaks back out to find him after the family goes to bed. She falls asleep with it in her arms, lost in fantasy until the doll becomes alive as a full-size man. It’s a parable, no?”

Overall, this was a strange novel and I’ve never read anything quite like it. It’s dark, twisted, straddles some lines and definitely gave me slight Lolita vibes (this coming from a person who read Lolita and was grossed out but mind-blown at the same time). It’s also obvious that Abbott did her research about ballet. Many of the references and terms made me chuckle. I really enjoyed Abbott’s writing style - it’s direct, sharp, a bit acerbic, but not too bare. It’s definitely not flowery. This writing style really suited a novel like this, because it’s all abut the claustrophobic tension - the writing style does not get in the way at all and in fact, as I was reading I actually forgot about the writing, which is a weird thing to say, but it works and this is not easy for a writer to do. This was a page turner and I really enjoyed The Turnout. I may have to look into some of Abbott’s other novels. 

Rating: 3.5/5

Like my bookish content? Follow me on Instagram for more and SUBSCRIBE to my YouTube channel!

As of this post, I’m a little past the halfway mark of The Turnout by, Megan Abbott. This is my first time reading an Abbott novel and … this is a weird reading experience [emoji]. 

This is supposed to be weird, so Abbott is succeeding here. 

The Turnout is thriller that hones in on Dara, Marie and Charlie, who own a ballet studio together - the studio started by Dara and Marie’s mother. Charlie and Dara are married and Marie… Marie is odd. Dara is definitely the level headed, more sensible of the twins, while there seems to be something … underdeveloped about Marie, as if she’s still a child living in a 30-something year old’s body. I don’t really have a grasp on Charlie, as he always seems subdued - which I think Abbott did deliberately. Charlie can no longer dance, as he suffered a debilitating dance accident and has to take daily pain killers. 

Once an accident happens as the studio, the delicate and insular world of home and ballet that Dara, Charlie and Marie exist in begins to quickly unravel. A fourth individual, Derek, permeates their lives and unbalances everything. Also, The Nutcracker is in the periphery, as the ballet school is gearing up for their annual performances. 

Like I said, this book is weird and there’s only so much I can say, because with thrillers, it’s easy to give something away. Also, with still half of the story left to go, I’m still in limbo. 

The Turnout is packed with so many juxtapositions - gracefulness and harshness, innocence and carnality, youth and maturity, femininity and masculinity. There is this constant under current of sexuality - specifically female sexuality, that runs throughout the novel and Abbott uses ballet as a way to symbolize how female sexuality has this intensity, strength and even animalic urge humming just beneath it’s surface. The gracefulness of a dancer, the long lean lines, the ease in which they seem to move, the pink, the lace, the perfection, can only come to be through constant training, blood, sweat, and pain that is gratifying in a different way. Pain and pleasure straddle a fine line and only through pushing through that pain is perfection and pleasure achieved. 

Abbott has created a world of ballet that is actually a bit grimy - it’s dirty and gritty beneath the surface. She does play on the stereotypes that the world of ballet is conniving, ruthless and that these dancers will do anything to achieve that perfect, slender physical aesthetic. One would be naive to think that any industry does not have it’s skeletons in the closet and ballet is no exception, though I can see how some readers may not like how Abbott portrays ballet here. Though change in the world of ballet has been slower than that of even the modeling industry, it is changing. For me, it doesn’t bother me because Abbott is using these elements to only enhance the dark, almost claustrophobic atmosphere of the novel. 

There is also a slight Lolita vibe I’m picking up on and it’s weirding me out. 

But once I pick up this novel, I can’t put it down. Abbott sucks me and I’m so weirded out  and disturbed, yet so intrigued at the same time. And I’m a little nervous for some reason… 

Like my bookish content? Follow me on Instagram for more and SUBSCRIBE to my YouTube channel!

I know a lot of people feel like January and February drag on, but I love these two cold, dreary months. For me, they are the last sigh of winter before spring starts creeping in. 

This month, I’ve got some books on my reading list that I’m really excited about. 

• Swann’s Way - I started this in January. Wow. What can I say about what this so far? It’s ethereal. A friend described it best and she said to me, “It’s like reading a dream.” I’m surprised by how quickly I’m reading this, even though I find myself rereading multiple passages because they are so beautifully written. It’s easy for me to sink into this and it’s hard for me to put down. 
• The Turnout - I’m eager to see how I get on with the ballet themed psychological thriller. I was also able to get a head start on this at the end of January. No opinions yet.
• Mythos - I love Greek mythology and I also love listening to Stephen Fry speak. This man could explain to me how grass grows and I’d listen. I’m going to accompany this book with the audiobook because it’s narrated by Fry. 
• The Hobbit - As much as I love Lord of the Rings, I’ve never read The Hobbit … I’m going to correct this error once I finish Swann’s Way. 

What are you reading this month?

Like my bookish content? Follow me on Instagram for more and SUBSCRIBE to my YouTube channel!

There are two recent releases that caught my eye - The Turnout and Mrs. March. I rarely impulse buy books, but the synopsis of both of these novels I knew I wanted to squeeze them onto my reading list this year. 

The Turnout by, Meg Abbott - I couldn’t say no to a psychological ballet thriller. Apparently this novel is quite twisted and dark. The Turnout is about two sisters who’s mother founded a famous dance school. The sisters end up running the school together after their parents’ tragic death, along with one of the sisters’ husbands. However, leading up to the annual Nutcracker performance a strange incident happens. I also love the title - turnout is crucial in ballet. It refers to how flexible a dancer is at the hips; the goal is to have the thigh get as parallel as possible from that joint that connects it to the hip. This helps produce those long, graceful lines and extensions that ballet dancers are known for. I’ll be curious to see how and if Abbot plays on this a metaphor.

Mrs. March by, Virginia Feito - Mrs. March’s husband is a famous novelist and she a person who places the utmost importance on appearances. She portrays a perfectly tailored life in the Upper East Side. However, someone points out to Mrs. March that the main character in her husband’s new novel, a prostitute, is about Mrs. March, or rather assumes that it’s Mrs. March. From there, Mrs. March begins to psychologically spiral. What really convinced me to pick up this novel is the nod paid to du Maurier’s novel Rebecca that Mrs. March has on her nightstand. I’ve heard this this novel is a slow burn but worth it, as Mrs. March’s mental state begins to decline and there are points in which the reader isn’t quite sure what’s real or what’s a figment of Mrs. March’s imagination. Also, I HATE roaches and the roach this cover is creeping me out! 

Have you read either of these books and are you a fan of psychological thrillers?

Like my bookish content? Follow me on Instagram for more!