Alana Estelle

Thanks to some of three novels I’ve read recently (Outline by Rachel Cusk, A Legacy by Sybille Bedford and Palladian by Elizabeth Taylor) , I been thinking about memory and how we internalize, commemorate, and idealize the events that happen in our lives. What these novels in particular made me think about is how other people also influence how we remember events. How much of our memory is actually our own and how does this impact the stories that we tell? If our memory is constantly being influenced by what we choose to remember and what others are impressing on us, are we thus all unreliable narrators, regardless of how honest we strive to be?

Here are a few quotes from these texts that sparked this train of thought. 

“The memory of suffering had no effect whatever on what they elected to do: on the contrary, it compelled them to repeat it, for the suffering was the magic that caused the object to come back and allowed the delight in dropping it to become possible again.” - Outline

Memory and emotions go hand-in-hand; how many times do you remember how you felt versus the specific events?

“Yet there was something worse than forgetting, which was misinterpretation, bias, the selective presentation of events. The truth had to be represented: it couldn’t be left to represent itself…” - Outline

We often find if critical that we take control over how we remember things. Have you ever felt irritated when someone contradicts how you recall something, because you are adamant about your version of events? This allows us to control the narrative, OUR narrative, and goes back to this idea of being unreliable. We may claim that our version of events is the truth, but actual truth is devoid of personal bias. 

“It will be a strange time for you, the time between her death and the day when you begin falsifying her… But soon, out of her bones will grow the new picture of her, more beautiful, more romantic than ever in life, always loving, never angry, never guilty.” - Palladian

We often tend to be overly romantic when memorializing the dead. It’s interesting how death can act as a type of authority over memory - in many cultures death is sacred and once someone has passed, there is a sense of decorum around how that individual is discussed. How many times have you been told not to speak ill of the dead? “Let the dead bury the dead.” How do customs around what is considered sacred distort our memories?

“What I learnt came to me, like everything else in this story, at a second and third hand, in chunks and puzzles, degrees and flashes, by here-say and tale-bearing and being told, by one or two descriptions that meant everything to those who gave them.” - A Legacy

To circle back around to how our memories are shaped by others, the memories that we get from other people are cherry-picked, thus, what is memorialized can be controlled by those who have the means to preserve their narrative, and only what they wish to preserve. Regardless of how much someone claims their version to be the truth, there are always three sides to a story: Side A, Side B and the actual truth.

Again, this is just a glimpse of the mental wanderings that my brain goes down due to the books. Have you read any books that focus on the concept of memory?

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A Legacy by, Sybille Beford is a novel chronicling two German families before WWI. The eccentric characters make decisions that have unexpected outcomes and lasting consequences that weave together an elusive narrative of family drama and politics. 

My friend Julia and I buddy read A Legacy together and I’m really glad we did! This novel sparked interesting conversations because it’s so unusual. I think that if I’d read this one by myself, I’d have been more confused. I’m going to state this at the beginning before diving into more details - this novel was a little confusing, cryptic, vague and a bit disjointed. 

I believe that Bedford did this deliberately, as the story is being told by Francesca, the daughter of two of the characters, Julius and Cassandra. This novel is not always told in the first person, it switches to the third person and is pieced together using fragments of events and conversations. 

“We are said to reinvent our memories; we often rearrange them. Did we hear this then? Do we remember saying that? Or do we remember being told what we said?”

Bedford is making the statement that memory is fallible; it is delicately held together by fleeting images, conversations and fragments. It’s subject to change and become more vague as more time passes and is dependent upon who is recounting the memory. In a sense, this while novel reads like a dream, in which the scenes and conversations seem to change abruptly, leaving behind a feeling of wistfulness. There are a decent amount of characters in this novel and I did get some of them confused, something I don’t usually struggle with - they seemed to blend together. Perhaps that was deliberate as well - it reminds me of those family members that I met as a child but barely remember because I was too young to recall things distinctly. I just remember their outlines. 

Also, at the heart of this novel is the theme of how love blinds people into making strange, rash decisions in the moment. However, decisions have consequences that may lay dormant for a while. 

“The moves that shape the future seldom shape their own intended ends; the course of self-interest is seen as a bee-line, only at the moment, and the history of individuals, groups and countries is the sum of these.”

Julia and I discussed how selfish a lot of these characters are - they make choices that have detrimental outcomes. Even though some of these choices are made in the ignorance and selfishness of youth, they can’t be excused. We felt that some of these characters were disappointing, in that they never really change. They stay stuck in their ways. This is realistic however, many people stay stuck in their traits. 

A Legacy also brings up an interesting question: Is it ever morally okay to lie?

“Perhaps, you are asked to do this, to set up the lie, as you call it, in redemption of a past lie of your own.”

There are so many instances of characters lying to each other - big and small lies, some to spare feelings and others to use for personal gain. Also, to what extent does delaying the truth help or make a situation worse? I don’t think these are questions that need immediate answers because they can be argued both ways. I just think they are interesting to think about because these are dilemmas we have all faced at some point in our lives. 

The way Bedford writes her characters caught my attention. The female characters are outwardly less emotional than the men, they tend to be a bit colder, more controlled, where as the men “wear their hearts on their sleeves.” Definitely an interesting role reversal. Also, there are a few animals that make cameos in the novel and when they are introduced, Bedford describes them using very human-like qualities. Many times, I didn’t know she was referring to an animal until she blatantly said “money” or “donkey.” I think that Bedford is making the point that we all straddle the line between being civilized and out of control, regardless of one’s station in life. 

Overall, A Legacy was a unique reading experience, but not a favorite. Due to it being vague and cryptic at times, Julia and I both said we were confused at some points. However, there are parts that are enjoyable and it is well written. I would even potentially reread this, because having hindsight will allow me to pick up on the subtle details I know I missed. However, I don’t think I’ll jump to read her other novels. A Legacy also provides interesting commentary on Germany’s political climate at the time and touches on the facets in society that played roles leading up to WWI and WWII. Lastly, I can see why Nancy Mitford was a fan of this novel - I’m sure she was able to relate to the eccentricity of these high-society characters, since her own family was, to say the least, a bit crazy. 

Rating: 3.25 (I gave it a 3 and Julia gave it a 3.5). 

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